Grateful for the Peace in the Wait

My freshest babe, just two years into feeling my arms around her, has chosen to leave the nest.

She’s a bona fide milk carton missing kid now.  I don’t know if it was her childhood traumatized brain, or if she felt oppressively controlled with a curfew, or if the lure of a Romeo & Juliet romance was so compelling, but she left for a dinner with her beau (against our wishes) and never came home.  

When the police officer stood up from my dining table after I shared our story and gave him her photo, I asked myself, Is this who I am now?  Someone who files missing person reports and alerts CPD’s human trafficking officer of our 17 yr old’s last known whereabouts?  Is this what I do? I use my private investigator skills to track her to an out-of-town bus station? We just had the best moments of our relationship this summer. I must have been mistaken to think our laughter and affection was authentic.

The truth is, I don’t know.  I don’t know what is true of us, because I don’t know what is true for her.  So I am choosing to dwell in what I do know is true.

She was the Lord’s child before she was ever mine.  He sees her. He knows where she is. He would leave the masses to go after her, his lost little sheep.  But he also respects her NO.  If she wants her will more than any other thing, the Lord will let her have what she wants.  He waits for us to ask for help. He waits for us to want Him. So I will also wait.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7 NIV

As I wait, I am thankful for God’s peace. I feel it guarding me from the terror that could immobilize in this situation.  I shouldn’t be able to sleep at night or function throughout the day, but I have a steadiness that makes no sense.  I am beyond grateful to dwell in a sense of wholeness instead of the fear of morgues and pimps and violence that wants my attention.

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Philippians 4:6-7, The Message

Join me in letting petition and praise shape our worries into prayers.  Pray for a lost child, who may not think she is lost, to return back home. In the name of Jesus.